“We Haven’t Spoken Once”: Bride Has A Dramatic Outburst Over A Child’s Wedding Outfit Interview With Author
The stress of a wedding can get the best of us, but at a certain point, you have to decide what is worth fighting over. Unfortunately, there are enough stories out there that prove just how volatile people can get. A newly-wed husband turned to the internet for advice after a particularly jarring experience with his bride and a nephew who happened to be wearing white.
The wife threw a massive fit and then decided to confront the six-year-old’s parents over the kid’s outfit. The situation escalated from there, provoking a heated debate among readers. We also got in touch with LifeTraining3452 to learn a bit more about the incident and his thoughts.
People can get very hostile over a wedding not going as they planned
Image credits: Wavebreakmedia (not the actual photo)
But one man thought his wife went a bit far when she kicked out a nephew over his outfit
Image credits: Lemnaouer (not the actual photo)
Image credits: LifeTraining3452
OP shared his thoughts on the stress caused by marriage
Bored Panda got in touch with LifeTraining3452 and he was kind enough to answer some of our questions about the entire incident. Naturally, we wanted to know if there had been any changes and shifts in the story. “Since my post, my wife and I have talked and we’ve decided on marriage counseling. My wife hasn’t apologized, and she is still staying with her mom, but she’s decided she’ll be coming home sometime this week.”
As often happens with these sorts of stories, readers were not in unanimous agreement, and arguments about who was to blame were thrown around aggressively. As one party, caught in the crossfire, we were curious to hear how OP felt about the advice and opinions of other netizens. “I ignored most suggestions from the comments because the majority suggested getting an annulment, but I am very in love with my wife and she’s never acted the way she did at our reception before,” he shared with Bored Panda.
This raises the question of whether there is something inherent to weddings in general that makes people volatile and perhaps a bit sensitive to things that wouldn’t bother them in a normal way “I think weddings make people more dramatic because people want their weddings to be absolutely perfect, and small mishaps can make them go crazy! I’d like to add that my wife and sister have had no issues prior to my wedding day since I saw a lot of comments wondering about that.”
Image credits: Agung Pandit Wiguna (not the actual photo)
Wedding planning often ends marriages before they even begin
Organizing a wedding is basically just a large, expressive party when you break it down into its core components. Event planning is, as many people have learned the hard way, quite stressful. Add in the emotional component and all the expectations and it’s easy to see how a wedding quickly becomes a minefield.
This stress, beyond the regular issues it causes, also has some “fun” bonus effects. Studies show that when a person feels under pressure, they tend to underestimate other people’s stress levels. This includes even one’s partner, which is generally the worst-case scenario for ignoring another person’s concerns. Because neither partner is assisting the other with dealing with pressure, it simply builds and builds and builds, until, like in OP’s story, it simply explodes outwards.
This isn’t to say that anything is acceptable just because you are stressed. The bride did overreact to a very, very minor issue. While the letter of the law, as it were, does “ban” white from weddings, this is to ensure that the bride can get her moment in the spotlight. After all, why spend all that money on a dress if it’s now competing with other white outfits? However, the “spirit” of the law was not actually broken in this case, as it’s pretty unlikely that anyone was paying too much attention to an actual child. Hopefully, OP and his partner can resolve any and all differences and move on from this incident.
Image credits: Nathan Cowley (not the actual photo)
NTA. The only reason why it's impolite for people to wear white is so that they wouldn't be confused with the newlyweds especially the bride. You can't really take a 6-year-old boy for a bride. The bride took this whole thing to the extreme and even cried because of that. I guess the wedding preparations totally stressed her out.
Not sure if it's only stress. If you are stressed out because of some event, after it is done, you get some sleep the next day, cool down, and start to think more clearly. The post was written 3 days after the wedding and she was still upset and not talking to the groom. I think there are some bigger issues in the mix.
Agreed. Even still there would be nothing wrong with partially white clothes and accessoires - as long as it is not fully white. I‘m glad the man stood by his opinion and maybe he married the wrong woman.
For the love of God, are the clouds supposed to change color because "mY wEdDiNg DaY!"?
Everyone there knows who the bride is and honestly doesn't care if Betsey or John wear White. Before Queen Victoria wore white for her wedding, it was not a thing and women wore all sorts of colors, usually their best dress they already had, or if they were wealthy, they would have a gown made, but it never had to be a specific color. Worrying about this ridiculous thing shows that woman are more concerned about the attention they need to have over the fact that the day is a celebration of your love and commitment to each other and the sharing that special time with the people you love. .
Everyone at the wedding knows who the bride is for christ sake! I didn't wear white for my wedding, and I didn't care if half the people coming wore the same color, because again, everyone there knew who was getting married and were there to celebrate us. Your wedding day is about you, your spouse and celebrating your love and commitment to each other. Brides who do this absolute b******t take away from the actual meaning of the day to make it about themselves and some weird ideas that that a wedding is the end all be all of their relationships. News flash, the wedding can be a special day signifying making a legal/religious/personal commitment, , but it is one day and it is the actual marriage and relationship you have for the rest of your life that matters.
Indeed and want to bet that, at 6 yo, the white jeans is his only formal attire?
In this case, the bride made a specific request that no one wear white, and the groom's sister responded by dressing her six year old son completely in white. White trousers, white shirt, and white bowtie. This was clearly intended to provoke the bride, while letting SIL gaslight her as 'overreacting' and 'bridezilla'.
It didn't say white shirt. By the sounds of it he was wearing a coloured shirt with white trousers and tie. So not mistakeable for the bridal party. Her reaction was OTT and she needs to apologise not him.
NTA. I always thought the "no white" rule was mainly for women, so that another woman would not upstage the bride. WHO CARES if a six year old boy wears a partly white outfit. The silliness of it all makes me wonder if that is really in fact the issue, or maybe this bride just has underlying issues with his sister that spilled over. On the other hand, she may be one of those Bridezillas who thinks that everything needs to be picture perfect on her wedding day. Regardless, she is a fool for letting this small disagreement become an issue in her marriage. How is she going to handle big problems if she can't handle little ones?
The no-white is relatively new, partially because queen Victoria started the white wedding dress trend, and partially because it used to be a thing that the bridesmaids looked as much like the bride as possible so in case someone tried to kidnap the bride, they'd get the wrong person. But in general don't wear the same colour as the bride even if that's red, white or blue. Details such as the kid's bowtie or a pair of pants should be perfectly fine though, as long as it's not your main colour
It wasn't kidnapping, more to confuse evil spirits that bring bad luck.
That's the version I heard too.
I'm sure I've seen more than one little girl wearing white at weddings too. Pretty sure the last few flower girls I can remember were wearing little "princess" style white dresses and no one batted an eye. The fact it's not even a little girl in a dress it's a boy in jeans just makes this even more ridiculous. I'd understand the anger if his adult *sister* had turned up in a white dress but not a kid. I don't think it's necessary to jump immediately to annulment but they really need to have a serious talk about how they deal with future disagreements.
I think a lot of people forget that as fun as weddings are, it is the marriage that is important. Can you imagine? Child: Mum are we going to Aunty OP's for Christmas? Mum: No Darling. child: Why not I want to see my cousin's! Dad: well lad, back when you were aware nipper you wore the wrong colour to Aunty OP's wedding and Uncle OP was on your side, so now we can't see that side of the family...
That wont be a problem if the guy smartens up and divorces this nut
Right! Everyone knows who the bride is for f**k sake! I honestly don't know if I would go to a wedding with these types of requests, because you are showing me you care more about all the attention you need to have on "YOUR SPECIAL DAY" instead of inviting us to celebrate the love you and your spouse share and the commitment you are making to each other. Thankfully all the wedding I have been to have been the latter, and 99% of the time a blast!
NTA. The only reason why it's impolite for people to wear white is so that they wouldn't be confused with the newlyweds especially the bride. You can't really take a 6-year-old boy for a bride. The bride took this whole thing to the extreme and even cried because of that. I guess the wedding preparations totally stressed her out.
Not sure if it's only stress. If you are stressed out because of some event, after it is done, you get some sleep the next day, cool down, and start to think more clearly. The post was written 3 days after the wedding and she was still upset and not talking to the groom. I think there are some bigger issues in the mix.
Agreed. Even still there would be nothing wrong with partially white clothes and accessoires - as long as it is not fully white. I‘m glad the man stood by his opinion and maybe he married the wrong woman.
For the love of God, are the clouds supposed to change color because "mY wEdDiNg DaY!"?
Everyone there knows who the bride is and honestly doesn't care if Betsey or John wear White. Before Queen Victoria wore white for her wedding, it was not a thing and women wore all sorts of colors, usually their best dress they already had, or if they were wealthy, they would have a gown made, but it never had to be a specific color. Worrying about this ridiculous thing shows that woman are more concerned about the attention they need to have over the fact that the day is a celebration of your love and commitment to each other and the sharing that special time with the people you love. .
Everyone at the wedding knows who the bride is for christ sake! I didn't wear white for my wedding, and I didn't care if half the people coming wore the same color, because again, everyone there knew who was getting married and were there to celebrate us. Your wedding day is about you, your spouse and celebrating your love and commitment to each other. Brides who do this absolute b******t take away from the actual meaning of the day to make it about themselves and some weird ideas that that a wedding is the end all be all of their relationships. News flash, the wedding can be a special day signifying making a legal/religious/personal commitment, , but it is one day and it is the actual marriage and relationship you have for the rest of your life that matters.
Indeed and want to bet that, at 6 yo, the white jeans is his only formal attire?
In this case, the bride made a specific request that no one wear white, and the groom's sister responded by dressing her six year old son completely in white. White trousers, white shirt, and white bowtie. This was clearly intended to provoke the bride, while letting SIL gaslight her as 'overreacting' and 'bridezilla'.
It didn't say white shirt. By the sounds of it he was wearing a coloured shirt with white trousers and tie. So not mistakeable for the bridal party. Her reaction was OTT and she needs to apologise not him.
NTA. I always thought the "no white" rule was mainly for women, so that another woman would not upstage the bride. WHO CARES if a six year old boy wears a partly white outfit. The silliness of it all makes me wonder if that is really in fact the issue, or maybe this bride just has underlying issues with his sister that spilled over. On the other hand, she may be one of those Bridezillas who thinks that everything needs to be picture perfect on her wedding day. Regardless, she is a fool for letting this small disagreement become an issue in her marriage. How is she going to handle big problems if she can't handle little ones?
The no-white is relatively new, partially because queen Victoria started the white wedding dress trend, and partially because it used to be a thing that the bridesmaids looked as much like the bride as possible so in case someone tried to kidnap the bride, they'd get the wrong person. But in general don't wear the same colour as the bride even if that's red, white or blue. Details such as the kid's bowtie or a pair of pants should be perfectly fine though, as long as it's not your main colour
It wasn't kidnapping, more to confuse evil spirits that bring bad luck.
That's the version I heard too.
I'm sure I've seen more than one little girl wearing white at weddings too. Pretty sure the last few flower girls I can remember were wearing little "princess" style white dresses and no one batted an eye. The fact it's not even a little girl in a dress it's a boy in jeans just makes this even more ridiculous. I'd understand the anger if his adult *sister* had turned up in a white dress but not a kid. I don't think it's necessary to jump immediately to annulment but they really need to have a serious talk about how they deal with future disagreements.
I think a lot of people forget that as fun as weddings are, it is the marriage that is important. Can you imagine? Child: Mum are we going to Aunty OP's for Christmas? Mum: No Darling. child: Why not I want to see my cousin's! Dad: well lad, back when you were aware nipper you wore the wrong colour to Aunty OP's wedding and Uncle OP was on your side, so now we can't see that side of the family...
That wont be a problem if the guy smartens up and divorces this nut
Right! Everyone knows who the bride is for f**k sake! I honestly don't know if I would go to a wedding with these types of requests, because you are showing me you care more about all the attention you need to have on "YOUR SPECIAL DAY" instead of inviting us to celebrate the love you and your spouse share and the commitment you are making to each other. Thankfully all the wedding I have been to have been the latter, and 99% of the time a blast!